Whew, sorry I’ve been gone so long! I could give you reasons, but I’ll just leave it at this. Do NOT try to swim across the Gulf of Mexico for decent tequila. It will be an ORDEAL.
Anyway, Happy New Year! How’s 2020 treating you? AEW has been keeping on, keeping on, but to be honest, things don’t feel like they’ve progressed much lately. But tonight, WE’RE ON A BOAT!
AEW comes to you from a cruise ship this week! Who will puke in the ring? (Spoiler: no one does)
Dynamite comes to you LIVE from the deck of the Norwegian Pearl as part of Chris Jericho’s cruise and I will admit this is a very interesting setting for a night of wrestling. Already the wind is clearly quite strong. I fear for the safety of Marko Stunt tonight.
SCU vs. Hangman Page/Kenny Omega – AEW Tag Team Title Match
We kick off the Rager with a tag team title match! The crowd is into it, already chanting curse words before the opening bell. A feeling out process between the teams shows how evenly matched they are. Kenny and Page seem to get the advantage over Sky, but SCU turns the tables and begin to work over Hangman. After a prolonged amount of punishment which includes a NASTY suplex that drops Page on his head, Omega is able to get the hot tag. Omega does some work on SCU while Page recovers. Kenny carries the load for the team and seems to be in control until Page hits an accidental(?) lariat on his partner.
During the break, Omega and Page get their act together and regain control. Kenny is delivering wicked suplexes and drivers on SCU but Kazarian stops the momentum and the teams exchange offense until a pair of Buckshot Lariats allow Hangman to pin Kazarian for the titles.
The Young Bucks come out to congratulate the new champs. The celebration seems strained, and Page leaves the group to visit ringside for a beer, then the crowd bodysurfs him to the entrance area. He stares back at the ring where the Elite stands without him. This was a solid match, but I think we have another “Tag Champs with Complications” storyline. These are usually decent stories, but they happen A LOT. Hopefully there are some twists that make it stand out.
Priscilla Kelly vs. Dr. Britt Baker
The announcers discuss Baker’s recent attitude issues and her feelings toward Riho, who the doctor feels may be less than committed to AEW.
The match isn’t much to write home about, but everyone forgets about that when Tony Schiavone speaks with the victorious Britt Baker. The DMD goes on a strange rant, attacking Tony for seemingly no reason, and then proceeds to tell everyone how sexy she is. She’s about to lay some dental smack on Schiavone when JR abruptly takes us to commercial. So weird.
Jurassic Express vs. Jericho/Santana/Ortiz
The proprietor of the cruise gets a nice ovation although the Express is certainly the crowd favorite. Jericho stays out of the ring as Santana and Ortiz take the majority of the punishment. Jungle Boy soon finds himself overwhelmed by the Inner Circle members and he takes a beating. Luchasaurus gets a hot tag and single-handedly dominates the trio. But Jake Hager steps in and distracts the ‘Saurus. Marko Stunt delivers a 450 to the Champ and gets a near fall to the crowd’s delight. A couple more near falls later, and Jericho is done playing around. Judas Effect gets the win for the Circle.
MJF vs. Joey Janela
MJF has set the stips for his match with Cody at Revolution, and tonight he’s here solo, feeling confident since Cody can’t touch him before the PPV.
MJF uses all the heel tactics to keep Janela off his game, but Kip Sabian is the one that really distracts Janela as he lays a kiss on Penelope at the entrance area. One Double-Cross later and MJF is victorious. Following the match, MJF taunts Cody, knowing he can’t do anything to him, but Rhodes does arrive and walks to the ring. After some more instigation, Cody takes the mike and informs Maxwell that he indeed can’t touch him, but the Bucks can and they sneak up behind to deliver a Superkick Party. The crowd agrees when Cody asks if they should throw Mr. Friedman in the pool. The Bucks do the deed and MJF splashes around a bit.
Tony is backstage talking to the new tag champs, but Tony diverts the conversation to talk about Kenny and PAC while Page looks on. Just as Page begins to talk again, the Bucks show up to cheer on the win. Page throws some shade at Matt and Nick, then takes off.
PAC vs. Jon Moxley – No. 1 Contender Match
Jericho is at ringside for commentary. Moxley enters the ring with a heavy bandage over his eye, and PAC goes to the eye early. The match moves to various locations on the boat (but that all happens during the commercial, because who needs to see that interesting part?) and Moxley is able to get a slight advantage, but it doesn’t last long as PAC turns the tables and goes right back to the eye. The men fight back and forth, with each one hitting signature moves, but Moxley is able to nail a perfect Paradigm Shift to win the match and win the shot at Jericho’s belt at Revolution.
Next week, Dynamite moves from a boat in the Bahamas to Cleveland, Ohio. Just a small change in scenery. But I’ll be here!
UNTIL NEXT WEEK!
